I'm so damn scared of being hurt and left alone. I just understood that today. I knew it before, but thought I was over it. I have not felt like this in a long time. With anyone. It's been years. This is different. And I am terrified. And for some reason I can't really talk about my feelings anymore. I keep it way too much inside of me. But I think that if I don't say it, then no one knows and then it's not that real and I can get over it faster.
When will I ever stop preparing myself for getting left alone? And will I understand I won't be left ALONE. It's ONE person, not my whole life or all my friends. But, well, if you care about someone that much it feels like everything, I guess.